Whether you are a first-time mom or not, you may find yourself suffering from mom guilt. Here are some helpful and effective tips to help overcome that mommy guilt.
Not once, not twice, that I’ve suffered from the fall of the mom guilt!
As I write this down, I think you’ll agree that I’m not alone either. Perhaps you’ve been in the same situation as a mother as well.
When I wrote the post on Work at Home Mom Struggles, I mentioned that mom guilt is one of the struggles we fight hard. Today, I can even confirm that this isn’t just the case for Work at Home Moms, but for every mom.
Not too long ago, I talked to my friend, who just opened up to me about how guilty she feels when she isn’t with her child. I was stunned, thinking I was the only one, as I have to hold still for a moment when my daughter is with her dad to finish a blog post. It was even hard for her to rush to the bathroom.
Even though I was surprised, I could relate too. I felt the same way for the first month. I couldn’t do anything but hold my daughter and watch her, and I thought it would be a sin to sit down and make coffee.
Mom’s guilt is real. We’ll experience it from time to time, whether you are WAHM or not.
Five tips that will help you get rid of mom guilt and enjoy motherhood
1. Identify the cause of your guilt
Mom guilt has many causes. Such as;
- Personal insecurities
- Pressure from family & friends
- Being carried away by what we see on social media and much more.
As I may have mentioned before, identifying the problem is the beginning of overcoming it. Once you know what the problem is, then you are on the right track to taking action on how to work on it.
2. Distance yourself from negativity
Here, the negativity could be internal or external.
Internal: Whereby, you have voices in the back of your mind that you are not good because of this and that.
External: You have friends or people around you who are pressuring you by telling you that your behavior isn’t right.
If you read the post “How to Empower Other Moms,” I mentioned that it would be good not to put each other down. No one is perfect. I, too, have my flaws, and I learn new things from other moms every day.
So if you feel weakened by people who always give negative vibes, it’s good to step back and distance yourself from them.
3. Remember you are worth
Dear mom, you are a human being. You need to rest; you need to shower or have some “me time.”
So, if possible, feel free to step aside for a few minutes or hours and do something else.
As much as we want to be around our kids and give them all the attention, we should also create a balance without feeling guilty. Don’t forget about yourself and take care of other things you want to pursue.
4. See the perfect in you
It wasn’t long ago that I posted “whether a perfect mother exists.” My focus was to encourage you and me to be strong in this journey of motherhood.
I realized that we are carried by much of what we see from others and forget to be ourselves. Not only that, but that ends up giving us that “mom guilt” where we feel we aren’t doing what’s best for our children.
Let me give you some good advice:
- Learn to believe in yourself.
- Appreciate what you are doing for your baby.
- Remember that there is no better mother for your children than you.
In this way, you can successfully fight and overcome the mothers’ guilt.
5. Sacrifice some specific hours or days to spend with your baby
In my case, for example, there are times when I feel this maternal guilt. The reason is that I spent my day focusing on my blog, online courses that I’m taking, or even homework.
As soon as I recognize the feeling, I schedule a few hours in the evening or even a whole day where I disconnect from everything else and play with my daughter.
As for you, if you are a working mom or even a stay-at-home mom, try to find a particular time for your little one as often as possible. Not only does this strengthen the bond, but it also helps combat mom guilt.